Monthly Archives: July 2012

Love’s entanglement

Even when everything can be going right at the stage we are in, I can’t help but wonder what will happen in a year or two, but especially in five. Are we on a path destined to end and if we are, is it worth the pain? The pain that will be 100 times stronger than if it would be if it were to end now.

 We’re moving together, but are you moving in the same direction I am or am I in yours? How can something smaller than the weight of love, be the decision of destiny?

It’s too early to know now. But how long do we wait to know when the right way is the way we’re moving?  Because the longer we climb, the harder we will fall.

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A Sunny Thunderstorm

This weekend was a flurry of emotions for me.

At one spectrum, I was more than happy because I got to hang out with two people who are of extreme importance in my life. Drinks were drunk, songs were danced, samosas were eaten. The beach  was definitely a great part of the weekend as well. Not so much for relaxing, but for the sport I love best, beach volleyball. Oh how I love it. It is so challenging, so tough, but yet so easy and calming. It really is the best of both worlds.The only thing that I’m not too fond of is the sun. Sun is great, but too much is not obviously. I’m starting to develop freckles on my forearms and the ones on my shoulder are multiplying. I was told that freckles are bad if they are developed from the sun, and with that on my mind I keep thinking I’m going to attract skin cancer the more I play. But I don’t think I can ever stop playing, even if it’s not good for my health.

On the other spectrum, I was flooded with very, very sad news. News that is only going to become more common as the years come and go. I’m not one to deal with bad news very well. To be honest, I don’t know how to. In my culture, there are many things you don’t bring up because of superstitions. As a Chinese born Canadian, it’s hard to find a balance between the two cultures. I have the urge to talk about what happened and to seek the support I need, but at the same time I hold back from because my Chinese customs believing  it’s bad luck to speak of such things. How does one find a balance between the clash?

Let alone, how do you describe a weekend like this? It was absolutely fantastic, but it was also extremely sad. I’m torn from all directions and I don’t know how to mend the gap.

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